Thoughts on Life & Death, Heaven & Hell

In looking at how I operate, that has the world occur around me the way that it does, has opened up so much for me about Life and of course on the other end of that Death.  Heaven & Hell, what's here now and what comes next.

What I’ve really come to is this… and it may seem a little backwards in how I communicate it, so just hang in there with it.  The way I see it, every religion and belief seems to fit this image I have, they all fit within it somewhere.  I’ve not found anything to discount it - yet (and believe me I’ve been looking).  In looking (Buddhism, Christianity, Zen, Philosophy, Existentialism, Etc…) I only keep finding pieces of puzzle that fit this massive mosaic of how it all really works.  And whole worlds within worlds that seem to transcend all the “stuckness” of the everyday human existence.  Which is of course so fascinating, I just continue to pursue the inquiry. 

Consider several things:

 1) That we are hugely more powerful creations than we even begin to scratch the surface of and when we’re not being THAT we feel constrained, trapped, imprisoned inside a life that just seems less than what know is available and can’t seem to access

2) Every Single Thing we think we know about the world and our life - Is Made Up (like perceptions, beliefs, imagination)

3) The meaning of life…. “The purpose of life” is not something you find.  *It’s something you create.*

Yeah, ^go ahead and re-read that whole paragraph again ^.  Like just take a moment to sit with the three things I just shared, just consider them as an unknown truth.  Like something you don’t yet about the world.  Something hidden from the view.

Negative perception of life, makes living life Hell.  Like everything that occurs in a person’s world reinforces the shitty experience they have of what it is to be human.  Resignation, Bitterness, Resentment, Frustration, Anger, Disempowerment, Lovelessness.

Positive perceptions of life, makes living life Heaven.  Like everything that occurs reinforces a grace about life, Fun, Loving, Expressive, Empowering, Inspiring, Amazing and Enlightening.

If we look at how we see our life, like “how we feel about it”… what’s that description?  How do you feel about life?  Stop, and take a moment to think about that. “How do you FEEL about life?”   Then take those responses and look for yourself… is the experience of life like Heaven, Hell or just kind of eh – in-between?

Where I’m going with this is that Life & Death are a part of the same world.  Not “this world” and then “that world”.  But if you must think in “this” or “that” terms…..think of it as: What you have in this world is exactly what you’ll have in the next.  Because we make it up, like our soul makes it up.  The part of us that never dies… makes it up.  We are the creators.  Like mini-gods we choose to create a whole world of Heaven or Hell to experience.  And when the physical body ends, our soul goes on to create the next.  If you don’t recognize the part you play in this HUGE creation, and utilize the immense power you have to create the experience.. you’ll be resigned to just re-create what you already know.  Like literally recreate a bigger better version of Hell over and over again in an ongoing cycle.  There is no escape from that future except to become aware of yourself as the source and creator of the world in which you live.  You’re already creating…. In every action in every moment in every day.  It’s just… Are you aware of what you are creating?  Like CLEARLY aware?

So we create the prison, we create the Hell… so we can experience the Heaven =)  Kind of messed up, but if you consider how powerfully creative we are… get it like a game we’ve created for ourselves.  Like we set up obstacles in our life, just so we get to experience over coming those obstacle…  and on the other side of  those prison walls of our own version of Hell…. We get a greater sense of our own power, ourselves, our capability and the amazing experience of what it means to be human.   You’ve got to be in the dark in order to see the light.

So how do you create the shift? 

The following is a snippet I wrote for Jim Palmer (Author of Devine Nobodies, Wide Open Spaces and Being Jesus in Nashville) when he asked me to share a little something on what I think it means to be Jesus.   Highly fascinating, and again in my inquiry, his message totally aligned with this vision I have of how it all works.   His book, my article speaks to, is called “Being Jesus”…. Taking into account the Christian view that you can only reach Salvation (Heaven) through Jesus Christ’s teaching AND just as Jesus is, We All Are. 

Even though the writing is about Being Jesus, it’s not actually religious.  

 _Enjoy_

Being Jesus means being free from all constraint. 

The first thing that shows up in that statement, right after “what the heck does that mean??!” is how do you get free from any single constraint more or less ALL of them??  Both totally valid questions.  Let’s take it in parts. 

Forward has to start somewhere, right?  To get anywhere you first have to know where you currently are.  Life is like this: as one moves through the years, they accumulate the stones of knowledge that have marked the path of do’s and don’ts.  Like those rocks get collected along the way in the make-up of who you are in a metaphorical back pack that sits solid. This back pack is yours and yours alone.  You carry it everywhere you go.  Knowing all the while, the weight of the world grows heavier with each step, each moment and no one else can seem to grasp the burden you now find yourself carrying.  The thought of taking on any more, even one single thing, is paralyzing.  There’s a looooong pause in life when you reach that moment.  When being still and coping is all there is to do, we take what little is left of our joy, faith, and love of life and hide it away from the impending darkness. 

We build walls to protect our heart, happiness and rapidly diminishing light.   With amazing velocity we build one wall for every stone of life’s lessons.  A wall for never trusting anyone to take care of us.  Another wall to never forgive for something wronged.  Another wall for riotousness.  Another wall for hatred.  Another wall for guilt.  Another wall for sadness.  Another wall for jerks.  Another wall for people that seem too nice.  A wall for certain kinds of men or woman.  Walls to protect against an entire race or in some cases only part of a race (like the poorer half or the half with non-native language).  There are so many walls.  Walls against family.  Walls against religion.  Even walls against God himself.   We’ve spent so much time building walls; we’ve completely forgotten to live life.  

During this depressing time, there’s a chance to take a look around.  Around and all around, at the walls.  So many walls to protect ourselves that we have essentially created a labyrinth.  A self-made prison that even we can’t navigate and quite possibly has no way out.  That is the confinement we’re talking about.  It’s a trap the mind sets in the game of life, that near most all players fall for. 

That’s the particular confinement important to get, before I set out to share with you something about Jesus that is key to know in Being Jesus yourself.   As I said previously, being Jesus means being free from all constraint.  This is quite literally freedom from yourself, your past, your beliefs, your desires, your pains, your jealousy, your everything.  Freedom in all areas of your life until there is nothing left but just you.  Stripped down to the pure light of loving harmony. 

Consider, you were born pure.  You were born without a care in the world.  And in that, had no way to compare what you had.  So in the game of life, you took on obstacles.  One by one you collected your mile markers and built your walls for the exact purpose of having comparison.  Take it as far as you can from what you really want, forget you’re playing the game and sit still in the confinement so you can get the tremendous impact and want to overcome!  In getting you put these walls in place, and technically they’re only metaphorical anyways, you can indeed walk right through them.  Choose the direction (ANY direction) other than the one you’ve been taking and keep walking.  When you come to the wall of hatred, stop hating and you’ll pass right through.  When you come to the wall of vanity, stop being vain and you’ll continue on.  When you come to the wall of distrust, trust again and the wall will vanish.  When you come to the wall of fear, fear not and you’ll pass right through fearlessly.  With each wall, freedom from constraint is found and in its place is wide open spaces.  Everything you’ve been searching for but could never find is there beyond those walls.  It’s been there the whole time.  You need only clear the view to see them. 

In doing so… you become pure again.  In doing so, you will witness an inspiring awareness begin to show up in your presence. You will experience a warmth you’ve never known and can’t describe. You will know a truth that can’t be taught and can’t be denied.  And you will have found the You; you’ve always been looking for.  Do this and you will have uncovered the walking path of Jesus Christ and you will know God in a way that only his children do.  You will be, “Being Jesus.”

Jamie Bihl (10/18/2011)

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Horse & Rider, Emotions & Logic

All sentient beings have the potential to stop the spinning of the rat race wheel at any given moment. Yet we don’t…. like bad elevator music running in the background it goes unnoticed and untamed.   Meanwhile amongst this chaos we create the perception of our reality.  A false reality, one we will fight tooth and nail for like an animal…. But not even be in love with. 

As I love analogies please allow me to share one of my favorites.  It’s a representation I use, to create outside of myself a tangible image, as an assessment and aid for myself.  I refer to it as being the horse or being the rider.

We live in an emotionally driven world, emotionally driven culture and emotionally driven upbringing.  Emotions are like lightning, they show up unpredictable and sometimes can be beautifully expressive and sometimes can cause complete disaster… they’re much like an untamed horse.  We, as humans, are like an untamed horse – and don’t even realize it.  Startled by what frightens us, fight or flight, we kick up our feet in defense or we flee from what we believe is the source of the upset.  We’re steered by our feelings and our beliefs about the way we feel in such a way that the use of higher intellect and logic are not even remotely accessible in those moments.  Unfortunately, it is specifically in those moments they are needed the most, as those unguarded actions become the mile markers in the wake of our path.  The permanence of how the world sees us, until it lays new eyes upon us again.   Once you gain control of your horse, you may rise above and be the rider.  Be the command of your life, the center focus and creator of where you go, how you get there and how fast you stride.  We are just as capable of being in that kind of control as we are capable of breathing.

How to ride your horse as an analogy to life and what to expect:

FIRST, with full intention, grab hold firmly by the bit (This is Ownership… you can’t be in control of your life if you’re not even willing to put your hands on it.  It’s uneasy only because you are uncertain what happens next.  What happens next is not “chaos” like the voice in your head has been warning, but a simple sensation of “stun” or “silence”.  In that quiet space, one might try to immediately return to the scramble… don’t let it, hold firm, sit with the silence… the quiet, the clarity)

SECOND, show affection (This is Respect…  you’ll never win over a part of yourself that thinks you’re not worthy for it to listen to.   Be connected to your emotions and have an honest relationship with them.  How you process the data from your life, comparing it to previous apples and create the patterns to which to trust in or avoid, is how you USED to be.  Respect that for what it was, let it be what it is, and process differently now)

THIRD, mount quickly with reigns in hand and stay calm and steady (This is where Resistance may show up…  you second guess yourself anytime you’re trying something new or putting yourself out there in a way you’ve not before…  resisting being a better version of yourself is totally natural.  Expect it, push it aside when it shows up, and stay focused on being in control.. This antsy-ness will pass, the sooner you quit worrying about it being there, the faster it will pass)

FOURTH, create direction (This is Living… no one says you can only ride if you ride a path clearly marked.  Fuck that path.  Create your own… You may be surprised to see the mountains move and rivers part to greet you as a guest to where you’ve never before been.  Where ever in life, love, fun, relationships, careers you’ve not before been… go there now and take in the new world with childlike curiosity)

FIFTH, remind, reassure and redirect (This is where Life will try to Life ya…. This is where practice will make or break you as a rider.  If you want to be a rider, be committed to being a rider at all times.  If you find yourself face down in the dirt, get up and get right back on.  That moment has passed the minute you stand up, don’t make it mean more than it is.  When your emotions kick up… be completely present to the emotions.  See those emotions kick up like a horse lifting on its hind legs.  You’re either going to fall off your horse or someone is going to get hurt… unless, you control your horse.  BE. THE. RIDER.  Hold firm to logic, look at the facts of what is occurring and silence all the voices that tell you how to feel about it.  Silence all the stories about what it means and how it’s just like something else.  No two moments in life are the same, only the stories we make up about them are.  Calm your horse, hold firm the reigns and redirect.  Remind your horse that you are its rider and it doesn’t make the decisions about where you go anymore. The more consistently you redirect your horse when it kicks up, the less it will kick up... and the more centered and peaceful life will be)

A Master Rider’s horse only rises to its hind legs when commanded to do so.

Food for Thought / Higher Intellect – Designing & Defining Your "Self"

If you could design and define yourself from scratch, what does that look like to you?

Did you know that you have complete and total control over your life?  Who you are in this world.  How you are and Who you are to the people in this world.  Even control over how you are impacted by the happenings of the world and the people around you.

At any given moment (like THIS ONE) you can mold yourself into any way of being you’d like.  We are not made of cement.  We are not bound by rules or walls or boxes or cages…. Not when it comes to who WE are as individuals.  We are not constrained by any other than ourselves, and we have complete control over even that.  So if life is not “working out the way you want it to”… I encourage you to explore some ideas.   Who cares, why up to this point it’s not worked out… none of that matters, it’s not like you can go back in time.  Only where you are going from this moment forward matters.

Come explore with me:

Make a list of the things you love about yourself. (keep pile)

Make a list of things that you know hold you back in life. (toss pile)

Without consideration of how it currently is, or lack of money or lack of energy, without consideration of the past and how things may have or may have not gone… like on a blank canvas paint these answers for yourself.  Imagine 5 years from now.. you with an amazing life, I mean AMAZING!!!! Blow the top off amazingly amazing,  incredibly happy, waking up every morning fulfilled and completely at peace with how life is!  From that space, the image of 5 years from now, answer these questions (and any others you think of) for yourself.

What does the ideal relationship look like for you?

What does the ideal job look like for you?

What does the ideal weekend look like for you?

What does your living environment look like for you?

What do you look like to / how do you occur to other people?

What would you give the world that it has a lack of?

What would ultimately define your happiness?

Now – on your canvas, looking at everything you’ve ever wanted laid out in front of you, move the canvas 4 ½ feet in front of your body.   Now, imagine turning it slightly translucent… a little more… a little more… perfect.  You can still see the outlines of what your ideal life looks like, but can also see reality as it comes toward you or you towards it, right?

In every interaction you have with the world, look at your choices for action through this translucent filter of WHO YOU WANT TO BE and have your actions correlate to those qualities you want for yourself.  When your actions correlate to what you want in the Ideal Version of You…. You become in every action what you want.  You ARE this person you want to be.  And it starts happening the very first time you correlate the action.  You will find that overnight, you’ve reached your 5 year goals in a matter of days maybe weeks.

Challenge yourself to be a role model for how you want your life to be.  Show yourself how amazing you are by being committed to having that life you want for yourself, not tomorrow, not next week, not next year.. but right here, right now, in every interaction you have.  Be committed to a life of happiness.  It’s *your* life, give that gift to yourself!

How much more will you gain from life by no longer trying to fix what doesn’t work and keeps showing up again and again?  If you will create for yourself a custom made template of your “way of being” and then wield your perception of life through that… You will begin to see what a huge role you really play in your life.  And an even bigger role, you play in your happiness.

And in a week or a year from now, when you’ve exceeded your expectations of that “ultimate happiness 5 years from now goal”… I encourage you to wipe your canvas clean and do it again!  Because LIFE is as amazing and as vast as you can imagine it to be. 

I’ll leave you with the thought I shared with a friend the other day, “Exactly what IS the brightest a star can shine?”   I say we find out.

Peace, Love & Fulfillment-

Starshine

Thoughts on Being Afraid to Fail

o      You can try and fail OR you can fail because you've never tried.

I've found the ONLY time I struggle with my identity, is when I'm resisting not being it. Might be better said like this... we become accustomed to ourselves (our identity) and very complacent in such a way because we KNOW we can survive like that.  And FEAR has you retreat back into your identity, because it’s safe there.... incredibly limiting life inside our own self-made captivity, but again we know we can survive there.

I've created a fantastic distinction around this, and I will share it with you.   Anytime I "struggle" on ANYTHING (tear up, feel angry or out of control, depressed or anxious) <~ that is my Identity doing IT'S thing, not Self doing MY thing ... I can distinguish the struggle is inauthentic and I am able to push the struggle aside by saying to myself the following and taking a leap of faith in an action that correlates.

"Follow your fear"

When you struggle, it's because your identity has you afraid of it. If you fear it/struggle with it... please know THAT is not you!!! It's the identity.  As part of self-awareness, "If you can distinguish it, you're not it".  Directly put - You are not your fear. Go towards that fear, instead of retreat from it... go towards it (sometimes this really really does feel like a blind leap of faith, I get that) but when you go towards your fear and create the action of doing something even though you are terrified of it, your identity is the one to retreat and you will find an amazing amount of confidence bestowed upon you and the world will open up for you as you move out of your own space (in your head) and into it’s space (reality).

Give it a try. Go do any one thing you've been telling your self you can't do. Go do it, today. Be unreasonable with yourself, force yourself to walk straight at the fear and you will find the fear is nothing but an illusion. Identity's illusion, not Yours. It's not real, it’s made up, to keep us safe from being eaten by a wild animal like back in the old days!!! Other than at the zoo, there are no tigers, lions or bears out here in our daily lives, yet we continue to treat our ability to do things like there is one standing on every single street corner. It's an illusion my friend. There is nothing, at all, to fear. Follow your fear and prove to yourself that it never existed to begin with. And if you make yourself ride that bike just one time even, there will be nobody in this world *including your identity* that will ever be able to hold you back from doing it again.

"Follow your fear."

What is socially acceptable?

Well… everything.  If you ask me. 

If you asked Cambridge, it says “PROPER” – “showing standards of behavior that are socially and morally acceptable.”

But wait, the question is… what is Socially Acceptable?  This is not a morality question.   Mustard on French Fries, where’s that stand in morality?  The statement is inherently flawed, because it’s made up.  The statement itself is an example of its name.

Here’s where I’m going with this….  

One day 10 white hair people sat around talking and one person said out loud “I want to dye my hair red”, and all the white haired people laughed then turned their cheek at this person and thought them insane, like blasphemy.  Embarrassed, this person laughed and retreated from their desire to express, by saying it was just in jest.  Dying hair red became not socially acceptable.  The white haired people left the gathering and mentioned the absurdity of red hair to other white haired people and thus reinforced the view, the collective agreement, that red hair was not “socially acceptable”.

One day 10 white hair people sat around talking and one person said out loud “I saw a rose this morning and couldn’t help but be taken by its beauty.  How the rays of light shined across the bend of the red petals and I felt complete happiness in its presence. I want to dye my hair red and be reminded every day of how beautiful and expressive things can be”.    A little taken for a moment there, one by one the white haired people shared in this thought about things they had seen that made them feel something special.  Inspired, one of the white haired people shared that she had seen in another village a woman crushing berries and using the red juices to color ribbon.  Another shared a willingness to assist in trying it.  Another heard that willingness and asked if she’d do hers too.  And like wild fire, excitement grew throughout the village of this new and exciting expression that anyone could be a part of.  And thus dying hair red became “socially acceptable”.

Here’s the difference.  When a thought is expressed, depending on level of self-awareness and inner peace, it is expressed from a space. 

When a thought is expressed from a space of fear (where you pull away from what you really want in order to avoid what others think – which really just brings the likelihood of that occurrence closer to you)… this place of fear is what has you sputter something out, in desperation to get it out there… but has it not be fully expressed the way you know in your heart for it to be.  The recipient feels the push towards your idea, and has no choice but to resist it.   

When a thought is expressed from a space of love, peace, expression and growth… There is no push or pull, but growth.  In the enrollment of others, where they can actually see for themselves the idea as it occurs for you…. Has them want to grow as well, and leave behind the small part of themself that previously wouldn’t have been open to experiencing something new. 

The growth is not possible, within just you.  We are truly connected and require one another in order for us to experience things and personally grow.   That is why They are more important than You are (even in typing that I feel my identity resist it… and thus I KNOW, it’s true).  We are so blindingly vain in our worthiness, that we really do think that “OUR” life is about us and us alone.   

You will only get it, when you give it to them.  Consider the possibility…. That that is how it really works. 

Let's Pretend...

Consider the art of our universe works as shared space.  To keep the balance a Yin = Yang.... a Win = a Lose.... a Nothing = a Everything.... a Give = a Get... a Push = a Resistance.  Just as they flow left to right, they also flow right to left…. and when areas are coupled, work independent of one another because even those different areas require balance as part of a whole too.  Don’t think too hard on that last line yet, just get the basic balance of the equal statements for now… and then take those into consideration before you act big… that’s a good place to start.  You’ll see results.

This balance is why: when nothing is sought, everything is found and when everything is sought nothing is found.

For more layman reference, this is why you feel empowered when you do something totally new to you… because in the courage you create to have that new experience, you are neither resisting nor pushing.  You instead are Growing.  Which if you read deeply into the first paragraph, I’ll answer the question:  Yes, growing too has a balance (it’s ALL connected).  When you grow, you release a part of your Self from being who you’ve always been.  See?  When you push aside who you’ve been (to experience something new), you pull towards yourself another way of being.  

This is why when you give yourself, you get yourself (for many this practice is a huge experience the first time you do it, as it may be the first time you experience something truly Selfless and thus the first time you truly experience Self).  The example in reverse is, how most people operate…  They think they have to get it, in order to give it…  (We have it backwards.  We only get it, when we give it.)

If you imagine we all have strings tied to us, to our body, our words, our actions… and if we Push to the Left with our actions, the world sways left with us all the way around until eventually on the right the result occurs… a Pull to the Right.  You get no where by resisting the natural sway of connectivity.  “Resisting” has a counter balance too and typically results in an impact to the person’s emotional state based on past experience and what they relate the new experience to.  If you are pulling the strings towards yourself in a futile attempt to “get it”… you are moving away from the ability to “give it”… Because you make it about you, when you even know you want it to be about them.  Instead try creating it for them… “give it”,  moving the strings outward, and when the cycle is complete you will have found you “get it” (and even more so than expected).  This balance of the shared space is why you get back from the world exactly what you’re trying to avoid… Because it’s all connected.  You pull away from the things you are avoiding… which actually moves them closer to you.  

If at this point, in your reading… you think I’m insane.   That’s cool, I get that.  At least it’s got you thinking about your view of insanity! =)  Let’s set that aside though, and Play a game.  Play a game, called “let’s pretend”.  Let’s pretend, in an exploration together… that maybe the world does work this way as I’ve described.  And look around for it.  Look around for it in your world, your daily happenings.  When you see it, I encourage you to be courageous and go to it.  Go straight for the direction you think you should avoid.  When you’re not running from it, it’s not chasing after you.  Remember the strings???  It’s all connected.  So… in being courageous and going towards your fear, towards your discomfort… you will find on the other side of the cycle something really new and exciting you’ve not gotten before.  

Share with me what you find, when you have actions that are completely opposite of the way you’ve always been.    Play the game.   It’s just a blog game…  what could it hurt? =)

Thoughts on Identity

Experiencing both sides of the coin myself, I deeply relate to those in the mud.  Just as the lotus, I'm a living example showing it's possible to break the surface of confinement and come into a new world (the authentic world) unscathed. 

One of the most interesting things I've found about my former identity is that it was craftier than I even knew.  The front or mask of "well put together" or "very organized" (<- if you've seen my house, are you kidding me?  It's the other end of the spectrum from what I present to the professional world) and "generous" and "relatable" and "fun".... all were masks I wore to compensate for gaping holes that 98% of the people in my life were never even privy to.  Then the 2% that did ever see them, fell into them.  Those that knew me deeply got hurt, and those that did not get hurt... hardly knew me at all.  I spent the first 32 years, just repeatedly trying to fill in holes... that weren't even there to being with. 

Honestly, until now... seeing the world from outside myself, I never knew compassion.  Not like this.  I certainly never knew compassion for one's self.  When you have compassion for others, you gain compassion for yourself.  "You have to Give it, to Get it".  This little quote applies to literally everything I've encountered from this space. Everything we need to know about the world is out there in the world, not in here with just you, or just me, or just that person over there.  Most of us have inherited the thought to look within for the answers.  There are no answers within... there are no answers inside caves or cages that we contain ourselves in to perpetuate the disconnection.  The only thing within, are things you already know... but nothing more... the new data comes from the real world (hints why even a hermit is a book-a-holic).  Take in that data clearly, and you gain more 10% more knowledge in each occurrence.  Take REAL data, out here in real reality that is not alllllll about you... and that knowledge awakens Emotional Maturity and an array of levels of Self Awareness.

When access to food (if you can even call it that these days) changed and we no longer were required to work with our neighbors to hunt, grow and harvest and insure our survival... that was the start of a huge disconnection.  It separated people, and then from there they thought separation was progress... then came single family "dwellings", and people stopped being with people and learning from people, they stopped being with the world and started just being with themselves.  They embraced their cage as home and said, this is all that there is.... all that I want... and the cage has to be bigger and fancier to make me happy... and it's continued like that... materialism to mask the hole left from the disconnection.  Come on people, it's still a cage!!!  And then this underlying sense of "why I can't connect with people" ran in the shadows of their minds.  The sadness of feeling disconnected, isolated, alone, why me syndrome.  Welcomed into creation Depression, Social Anxiety, Low Self Esteem.  Those happenings collapsed with the internal dialogue resulted in the internal answer to the internal question that "it's them, not me..." and "this is just the way the world is" and "I have no power over what happens to me"...  Again, there are no answers within. 

"If you can distinguish it, you are not it".  That is self-awareness.  To distinguish everything you encounter.. until nothing is left.  And each time you find nothing, create something new there.   Self can distinguish we are not our emotions, feelings, beliefs, intuitions, stories (Identity is the makeup of those things and how we reenact them).... If you can distinguish it, you are not it... and only in resisting that knowledge do we perpetuate identity. 

I'd like to encourage the world to stop resisting being one's self.